


The Fall

by NotEvenThat



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Crossing Timelines, Love Is The Devil, M/M, Magnus's spell book, Minor Choking, Parabatai Bond, Parallel Universes, Post 2x08, Self harm in the form of punching, past self harm, unintentional abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 15:41:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10924905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotEvenThat/pseuds/NotEvenThat
Summary: When the portal opened in front of him, Alec hadn't meant to fall into it. He knew the consequences. He knew that whatever universe he landed in, he would be stuck there, indefinitely.Alec falls into a universe where him and Magnus are mundanes.





	The Fall

When the portal opened up in front of him, Alec didn’t mean to fall into it. He knew better than that. Portals were opening up all across the world. Valentine and his army had found a way to not only rip a hole in the fabric of time but to rip millions of holes, all opening and closing randomly, sending Mundanes, Shadowhunters, Downworlders, _anyone_ who was so unfortunate to find themselves sucked into one, into another universe.

They weren’t sure if Valentine had meant to do this. If he just hadn’t know how to use Magnus’s book and had done it on accident or if he’d made someone who didn’t know how to use it do it or if _they_ had know what they were doing or not. They had no clue but the conclusion was the same, regardless. They needed to get the book back, so Magnus could fix it and they needed to get it back soon.

That's all he had been thinking about. That's all any of them had been thinking about, for the past week. They needed to get the book back. They needed to fix it.  

They were on the boat battling Valentine’s army, when it happened. Jace was somewhere behind him and Alec could feel the adrenalin thrumming through their bond. Jace turned and slashed at someone who came up behind him. Alec watched through Jace’s eyes as Magnus’s _disintegrated_ the enemies around him, in a wave of magic. Someone came up in front of him and Alec shot the body, the arrow sinking into the man’s neck, without even turning his attention to his own eyes.

That’s why he didn’t see it. Jace and him had fought like this for years, looking through each other's eyes, switching back and forth to see the whole battle field. It was a second nature. Alec did it without even thinking about it.

They had never had to look out for portals, though. It opened in front of Alec, shimmering like water in front of him, and Alec fell into it without even realizing, until it was too late. The last thing that Alec saw was Jace turning to him and Magnus, whirling around in panic, magic coming uselessly from his hands towards Alec.

Then everything went black and Alec woke up on the ground.

 

Alec wasn’t sure if he blacked out or if he simply landed in his other body and woke up. Either way, it happened the same. Alec’s eyes flew open. The adrenalin still pounding through his body. He was reeling from the lack of Jace in his mind. He moved on instinct and threw his body up, wrapping his hands tight around the neck of the person hovering over him and slamming them onto the ground, in a second.

Alec’s body was weak, compared to the one he was use to. He didn’t spare a glance down at himself but he knew, without even looking, that there were no runes on his body. Even his muscles were weak and unused. He threw himself on muscle memory and his hands reacted with the instincts of someone who’d been trained to kill but his body screamed in unfamiliar protest.  

He was in a field. The sun was shining down on his back and Alec noticed, before he even realized who he was choking, that he was naked. His cock was hard beneath him and it wavered, staying erect for a few moments before softening with the sudden absolute change of emotion.

Magnus’s hands moved to Alec’s grip on his neck and he pulled, the terror in his eyes washing over Alec in a cold flash of panic, even though the man below him only vaguely resembled the man he was use to.

Alec jumped back, falling backwards onto a soft blanket stretched out over the field, his eyes taking in the person in front of him, even as he landed in a defensive position. It was Magnus, stripped down to the bare minimum of his appearance. It was him, Alec could tell in a second, but everything about him was _wrong._

His eyes were soft brown, not unlike the the glamor that he normally had but Alec could see that it wasn’t a glamor. There was no shimmer, like there normally was when Alec looked at Magnus’s glamoured eyes. They were real and _beautiful_ but they struck Alec down to the core as _wrong._

Even Magnus’s body was soft. Alec had always loved how soft Magnus’s body was, compared to the scarred calloused body that was his but this was different. His muscles, much like Alec supposed his were, were gone. This Magnus didn’t look weak or unfit but his body was nothing like the toned body his Magnus’s had.

Alec looked up at him, his mouth gaping, his eyes staring in shock and pure panic as this other Magnus sat there on the ground, his throat already bruising from where Alec had gripped him, with heavy tears welling in his eyes.

 

They thought he was having a breakdown. Magnus and him got dressed and they walked to the car, that was parked a few feet from the field and they drove back to their home, that they apparently shared together. Alec followed, simply because he didn’t know what else to do and if Magnus found a way to come find him, he wasn’t going to risk not being there.

When they reached the apartment, Alec locked himself in the bathroom. He stayed in there for hours, pacing, trying to think of a way to go back, trying to think of a way to get ahold of Magnus, trying to think of _anything_ that he could do.

It was useless though. That’s why they had been trying so hard to close the portals. There were so many of them opening, to an infinite number of universes, that if someone fell into one of them they were gone. Magnus had said so himself.

The other Magnus pounded on the door for hours. He called for him. Tried to coax him out. Asked him what happened. Asked him if he should call someone. His voice was so soft and comforting, that Alec almost went to him every time and then he reminded himself that his Magnus was universes away and this person in front of him was just a pale comparison.

Alec must have been in there for close to nine hours, when Magnus finally called someone.

 

Jace knocked on the door softly, his words withered with worry. “Alec.. Why are you in the bathroom?” Alec didn’t answer. He was sitting on the cold tile floor now, with his back pressed against the tub. He’d been fighting for hours before he’d fallen into the portal. Even if this body couldn’t feel the ache of battle, his mind was tired. He didn’t think he could force himself to stand up and unlock the door, even if he wanted too. Which, he did not.  

“Alec..” Jace's voice dipped lower and Alec could tell that he was trying to talk without Magnus hearing him. Magnus was in the kitchen. Alec knew that because when Jace arrived, Magnus had been making tea, slamming things in the kitchen, yelling and then whispering quietly in frustration. “Magnus is scared you hurt yourself… again. If you don’t answer me, I’m going to call the police. He said he could hear you walking before and then you stopped. You’re.. scaring him, Alec.”

Alec looked down at himself and he saw it. There, on his wrist, were a million angry scars. Alec knew by looking at them that they had been deep. They were long since healed, pale and white, but Alec had no clue how old they were. In his body, they could have been hours old, healed and scarred with the use of an Iratze or Magnus’s magic. Now, he had no clue. They could have been weeks old or years.  

“Alec.. Please, just. Answer me.” 

Suddenly, Alec's mouth went dry with the thought of another conversation that had happened a million years away from here.

_Alec, please, talk to me._

Alec forced the words from his throat. They burned and stuck there, like even this body knew something was wrong and was trying to stop Alec from talking. “I’m fine.”

_I’m fine, Jace. Shouldn’t you be looking for Clary?_

Everything fell silent for a few moments and then Jace spoke, the relief obvious in his tone. “Magnus said you guys got into a fight. He.. doesn’t really know what happened. He said you grabbed him.”

_Clary’s fine… Did you and Magnus get into a fight or something?_

Alec didn’t answer. He had grabbed Magnus, hard, and now this Jace was here, trying to figure out what happened. Alec had nothing to say to him. Alec had nothing to say to any of them.

“Alec.. You’ve never grabbed Magnus before. What happened?” And then afterward, when Alec didn’t respond, “You’re my brother, Alec. You can tell me.”

_You’re my Parabatai, Alec. You can tell me._

Alec shook his head and look down at his lap, startled to feel tears streaming down his face. He hadn’t been without Jace, since he was thirteen. Every single day for years, Jace was there in his head, in his dreams. He felt Jace’s emotions and Jace felt his. Jace had become apart of him, until Alec didn’t know where he stopped and where Jace began and it hadn’t even mattered because they were that close.

Alec felt more alone that he had ever felt in his life and it had nothing to do with the vacant bathroom around him.

 

Eventually, he stood up. Jace didn’t stop talking to him but Alec didn’t respond again. He didn’t see a reason too. When Alec left the bathroom, he had been in there for twelve hours. His stomach was aching with hunger but Alec ignored it easily. This body wasn’t use to the strain Alec was putting on it but Alec’s mind was.

When he swung the door open, Jace was sitting on the other side of it. He was sitting in a kitchen chair that Magnus had probably brought over and he was slumped over uncomfortably on his elbow. Jace sat up instantly and stared up at Alec, wide eyed.

Magnus was sitting in the small living room right across from the bathroom. He was sitting on a soft worn looking couch that looked nothing like something Magnus should own. Everything in Magnus’s loft was expensive and extravagant. This apartment looked poor, thrown together and.. As much as Alec hated to admit it, homey.

Before he met Magnus, he probably would have preferred this soft environment to Magnus’s palace. Now though, the thought of Magnus living here made him sick. The thought of Magnus and him living here _together_ made him even sicker. Their home was full of weapons, spell books and far too expensive bed sheets. This apartment was full of blankets.

“Alec..” Jace spoke softly and slowly rose from the chair he’d been sitting in, wincing from his stiff legs, in a way that his Jace never would have.

Magnus looked at him tiredly, his eyes red and watery like he’d been crying, the bruise around his neck exceptionally dark.

No one spoke. Jace glanced between Magnus and Alec before looking down awkwardly and then moving towards Alec, his arms wrapping tightly around Alec's body before he could even react. Despite everything, despite knowing that it wasn’t his Jace, the hug made him feel better, if only a little bit.

After a moment, Jace let go and said, “I think you guys should talk. I’ll go hang out in your room for a while.” He glanced over at Magnus again, his eyes locking onto the bruise before glancing away uncomfortable, “Incase you need anything.” Jace stood awkwardly for another moment before turning and disappearing into a room, that Alec supposed was he and Magnus’s.

If this had been his Magnus, he would have walked over and sat at Magnus’s side. He would have told him that he was sorry and that he hadn’t meant to hurt him. Though, his Magnus would have already known. His Magnus would have understood that he hadn’t meant to attack him. He would have understood that Alec had been fighting moments before and landing in a body somewhere, with someone on top of him, had sparked the Shadowhunter part of his mind that was trained to kill.

If it had been his Magnus, it wouldn’t have even needed to be a discussion but here, in this universe where Alec was nothing but a mundane and he had no excuse for diving at Magnus and choking him, it did need to be a discussion and Alec wanted nothing to do with it.

Magnus looked at him for a long moment before looking down at his lap. If Alec stood long enough, he was sure that Magnus would either say something to him or he would start crying. Alec didn’t wait long enough for either of those outcomes.

He didn’t want to be here but he had no place else to go. He knew nothing about the mundane world, as this universe seemed to be. He had no money. He had nothing, not even his stele and Magnus wasn’t going to kick him out of their home. No matter what universe they were in.

“I’m going to sleep on the couch tonight.” It was easy to assume that he and Magnus slept together. That was confirmed when Magnus looked up at him, his expression shocked and hurt. He couldn’t imagine what his Magnus would do, if he suddenly changed and decided to sleep on the couch, rather than at his side. Alec tried not to think of it.

No one moved for a few moments and then Magnus stood up. He laughed humorlessly as he walked by and Alec reminded himself that it wasn’t his Magnus, even if a little part of him whispered, _‘It doesn’t matter. It's still him.’_

Jace came out of the bedroom a few moments later. He tried to talk to Alec for a few minutes, he tried to looks impartial, but Alec could tell he was annoyed with the way that he was treating Magnus. Alec wanted to reach out and hug him again. He wanted to ask him to stay. He wanted to tell him everything. He wanted to go to Magnus. He wanted to tell him he was sorry.

Jace left a few moments later and Alec was left alone.

 

He didn’t break for three days.

On the first day, Magnus was mad. Even in this universe, Alec could see the same signs that Magnus had always given him when he was mad. He ignored him the next morning. He made coffee for himself, and Alec was unsure if Magnus normally brought him coffee here, but the pointed look Magnus had given him as he sipped his suggested so.

When he came home that night (It had taken Alec and embarrassingly long time to realize that Magnus had gone to work because he was a mundane, not a warlock who worked from home,) he was sad. He stared at Alec like he wanted to go over and talking to him. If he had been home, Alec would have already cracked and been over there kissing him. In this universe, Alec sat in the living room until Magnus finally went to bed.

The second day Magnus had tried to talk to him. Alec stayed up most of the night, missing Magnus, missing his family, before falling asleep for a couple of hours on the couch. He woke up the second Magnus walked into the room. He could tell by the windows that it couldn’t have been earlier than two.

Alec snapped up and Magnus froze where he was standing, half in the living room, half in the kitchen, dressed only in a large shirt that looked too big for his body. He stared at Alec shocked for a few moments and it took Alec a second to realize that the mundane version of himself probably wasn’t trained to wake up at every sound.

“I thought you were asleep..” Magnus said, almost sounding nervous.

Alec didn’t correct him.

After a few moments, Magnus walked forward and sat, rather awkwardly on the couch a few feet away from Alec. He glanced up at him and then back down at his lap. He looked uncertain, hesitant and nothing like the man that Alec had fallen in love with.

Alec wanted to throw up.

“I don’t know why you’re upset with me..” Magnus started softly. He hadn’t done anything wrong. This Magnus hadn’t done anything wrong and yet, he was here, coddling Alec into talking. Alec thought about the first fight him and Magnus had ever gotten in and how even though Alec parabatai was missing and Magnus had understood why Alec was upset, he’d made it clear that Alec couldn’t treat him that way. He thought about this Magnus and how he’d choked him and then ignored him for days and all he wanted to do was tell him to stand up for himself.

“I really don’t know what happened. We were..” He looked up at Alec, his expression open and pained. “I thought we were fine and.. It’s like you just snapped and became a different person and now you won't talk to me and you’re sleeping out here.” Magnus rambled as he spoke and Alec looked away but he kept going. “You didn’t even go to work yesterday!”

It was stupid. There were a million other things that alienated Alec here. He was in a completely different _universe,_ as a species that he barely even knew in his own. He had nothing that was familiar to him. He had no one but hearing the words, ‘You didn’t even go to work yesterday,’ When Alec hadn’t even realized he had a job, felt like a blow to the chest. Suddenly, the reality of his situation came crashing down on him.

He’d cried about it days before. He’d hid in the bathroom for hours but sitting on a couch, that was far too soft to be comfortable, Alec realized that he wasn’t going back. Magnus wasn’t going to come save him. A portal wasn’t going to open in front of him and take him home. This was it. There was no way out.

This was his life now.

Alec wanted to cry. He wanted to scream and punch something until he went numb again. He wanted to spar with Jace. He wanted to kill something but he couldn’t do any of those things, so he just sat there completely still, listening to Magnus say words that meant _nothing_ to him, until he looked up again and found himself alone.

Alec left that night. The whole time Alec was walking, hoping, that a demon would jump in front of him. He didn’t even care that he didn’t have gear or a weapon to fight with. He wouldn’t have even minded if it killed him. The pure relief that Alec would have felt, seeing a shax demon impale him through the chest, almost brought him to tears again.

Alec punched a brick wall, until his mundane hands were bleeding and the feeling had passed.

 

When Alec found his way back to the apartment the next morning, Magnus was already gone. He looked down at his broken, bleeding skin and reached for his stele before flinching, when he realized that he didn’t have it and that it probably wouldn’t have worked for him, if he had.

Alec ran his hands under cold water until they stopped bleeding and then he walked into the bedroom, ignoring absolutely everything except the laptop that was resting on the desk. He opened it and stared blankly at the picture of him and Magnus on the screen.

They were young. They couldn’t have been older than sixteen. This mundane Alec looked younger than Alec imagined he had _ever_ looked and his arm was thrown around Magnus’s shoulders, smiling happily at Magnus, while Magnus smiled into the camera. They were in a field. It was brighter and the trees were in full bloom but it was painstakingly obvious that it was in the same field that Alec had choked Magnus in just days ago.

Alec stared until the screen went dark and then he finally opened the webpage and started searching.

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to post this when it was completely done but honestly, I'm hoping that posting it will refuel my urge to write it. Comment if you'd like me to continue. If enough people are into it, I'll finished it (I probably will anyway because I really like the thought but. Comment anyway?).


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